don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
