Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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