i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Oh god it's open bar.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
