yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
