Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
