God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
