Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
