my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
