I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I'm really busy with my period
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