No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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