don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
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