You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Randomize
