Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
What a dumb baby whore.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
