She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
