i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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