I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
