Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
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What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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