Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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