Kiss
Puke
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
