I feel like abortions should bother me more
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Mom said you looked used
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
