idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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