Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
