I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
