just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
