Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have feelings that need drinking.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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