If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
