When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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