Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Randomize
