Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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