I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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