quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
