Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
