ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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