Plan B is the new Plan A
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
