I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
