ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
