No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
