We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
