yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
