I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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