it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
you win again, gameday.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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