Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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