is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
