When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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