i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
