sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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