I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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