your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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