when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
