Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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