you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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